CHILDHOOD & TEEN DEPRESSION ?
Q.My son,18 yrs.,has just been diagnosed with depression and has been persribed celexa. He is our first born out of 3 and has been a quiet child since he was a toddler. (Very active & difficult as a toddler). His scholastic achievements have been average to above average in performance.
A.he mentioned "erasing himself" to get rid of the pain. On knowing this we recommended seeing a social worker. His dad is also seeing the social worker and has for the past 6 months for depression/anxiety. Depression runs on my side of the family also. Recently we found out that my son has felt bad & depressed since he was a young boy. He claims he does not remember being happy. My worry is that he has been depressed for that long and feel responsible for possibly causing or adding to the depression or not picking it up sooner. He has been a well liked by adults & peer,but always refered to as a quiet well mannered child. I feel some responsibility. The first thing I'd like to comment on is the statement that your son feels that he has been depressed forever. I remember making a similar statement myself, but it was while I was seriously depressed. In order to remember an emotional state, one has to be able to imagine the state to some degree, or the attempt at recollection fails. This is called state dependant recall. When depressed, one remembers other depressions quite readily. However, being unable to feel happy, one cannot remember happiness. This is one of the cognitive distortions of the mood disorder. It can be useful as a means of assessing the severity of the depression, but does not reflect reality. Secondly, I would hope to soothe a little of the parental guilt you feel. I really doubt there was much you could have done differently to prevent the situation. But now that this situation has arisen, there may be something you can do for everyone in your family....talk about this illness openly. I was 34 when I was first diagnosed, although your son's story is very much like my own. Mental illness wasn't talked about in my family, even though 100% of my male relatives are afflicted. I had no way of assessing my own condition or state, and no context for my feelings. I had no one to talk to about my concerns/impressions. I just thought that life was harder for me because I didn't try hard enough. I thought I had a character flaw, not a deadly illness. I thank God today that I finally talked to somebody, who quickly referred me for professional help. keep trying to put myself in his shoes but it is hard. I believe he can manage the studies and glad he is away but not too far away from home. (1 1/2 hrs) He has his roommates who he has met at orientation. (There is 3 to a room...ugh) He has conversed with them off & on this summer. They both asked him at orientation to be roommates together. (which to me is a good indicator that he'll make friends, but he is still nervous about dealing & making new friends) I experience a great college life & just want that for him.
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